Six years ago, my sister left the country to work abroad. That's first for our family, thus the adjustment was a little hard at first. Her then three year old daughter was so angry when she later on found out that her mom "left her". The first phone calls were tough; she didn't want to get near the phone.
After years of waiting, my sister finally gained a Canadian citizenship and brought her family with her. I think it would be better for my niece, being a girl, to grow up with her mom.
I was browsing a copy of Time magazine at National Bookstore yesterday, when i stumbled on this:
It's an
article about the increasing number of women, or Filipino mothers who are working as OCW's, leaving their kids behind.
“Children with homes to call their own are also struggling. According to a new UNICEF study, Filipino teenagers with one or both parents abroad, though they do better in school and have more allowance money, said they felt they were worse off — particularly when it came to their future — than peers with both parents living at home. Past studies have also shown that children with mothers abroad report feeling less happy than those with fathers abroad. "One parent can a do good job, but that doesn't happen a lot," says Dr. Esperanza A. Icasas-Cabral, the Secretary of the Department of Social Welfare and Development. "The social cost is great." But no government data exists for tracking the social progress of migrants' children, and that, social workers say, is a problem when millions of kids are thought to be at high risk for early pregnancy, incest, drug abuse and depression. Manila police, for instance, say that children with parents overseas are more exposed to violent crime, particularly rape and physical assault. "There are no parents watching," says Manila Police Officer Dolores Villegas.”
This reminds me of a friend whose parents are working abroad too. He was basically parentless for years, but never tried drugs nor has gotten into serious trouble. He has a sister, and they both finished college, without having to deal with issues like these. Although it is tough growing up without his parents around, he believes that their absence does not justify such actions.
I never really experienced growing without a mother beside me, so I guess I have no right to either agree or disagree. I believe though that the presence of a parent is very important especially at the stage of puberty. We need their advice; things that make us feel loved. But do you think, family values can only be acquired at home, with a parent?
